just remembered the other day a teen approached me holding a rapidly melting chunk of ice in his hand and asked if i wanted to buy a "limited edition pet rock"

Now draw her covered in ash and gore, using her dull sword to support her bodyweight

having a brain that is so desperate to make things n do things and a body that is desperate to rest n be still is a difficult combination ú-ù

They should remove voice acting from the legend of Zelda series so I can rename the main character Lonk again

The old games are hyped up more than they deserve but they are good because you can name the elf boy Gregory if you want to.

I usually call him Lonk.

image

image

*bolts up in bed* if phineas and ferb took place in the MLP universe he'd be called "dr hoofenshmirtz"

Dr. Hoofenshmirtz is a pony but Perry is still a platypus. No magic, still no talking. Just the exact same.

Just seen a bathroom sign that says "Femmes". Unsure if this is woke or not.

Update: the mens room says Hommes. This seafood restaurant is safe from the "woke mob" but not from the dastardly Frenchman

girls will start getting settled for sleep like "wow i'm getting to bed early tonight" and it's 3am

I wish I was a female tiger because then if I was talking to someone and I was getting off topic I could say “but I tigress,” and then kill and eat them because I am a tiger

the new dj crazytimes song … now that’s what I call music!

image
nonasuch:
“teamkrissy:
“katameme:
“”
Oh my God my vandalism has escaped containment
” ”

image

Oh my God my vandalism has escaped containment

image
1 2 3 4 5 Next